Angry Web

USA Today has published the first official photo of Iron Man 2. Looks like Tony Stark’s built up quite a collection.

Iron Man 2 is scheduled for a May 7, 2010 release date.

2 reasons why you should watch this movie:

1. Megan Fox is hot.
2. Megan Fox is hot.

Clear enough?  Good.

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen hits theaters June 24, 2009.

…Megan Fox in an olde timey hooker outfit. These rootin’ tootin’ images are of the lovely Miss Fox in wardrobe from the up coming movie “Jonah Hex”. She definitely puts the “Wild” in Wild West.

So let’s get this right – Jean-Claude Van Damme and Dolph Lundgren have reunited for another Universal Soldier movie? Kickass!!!

Director John Hyams has been in Bulgaria since February filming the third film in the franchise, “Universal Soldiers: The Next Generation” (I, personally, thought Universal Soldiers: Voyager would’ve been a better title…). Based on these set pics here, it looks like we’ll be seeing nothing short of an R-rated killfest. Let’s hope they’re aiming for a theatrical release rather than a cheap direct-to-dvd hack job because honestly, who doesn’t want to see Van Damme and Lundgren back together on the big screen again?

Russell Crowe and Ridly Scott are teaming up once again to bring you a new epic film. This time, the classic tale of “Robin Hood” is being reimagined making it a point to stay clear of the tights that the charachter so commonly sports.

“He doesn’t have the old Robin Hood tights,” says producer Brian Grazer. “He’s got armor. He’s very medieval. He looks, if anything, more like he did in Gladiator than anything we’re used to seeing with Robin Hood.”

This movie is set to release May 14, 2010 and don’t worry…Kevin Costner has nothing to do with it.

How do you even remotely pitch such a project to a major studio?  Oh, right…this is Twentieth Century Fox we’re talking about.  Those producers will buy into anything as long as it appears marketable.  Who cares who directs it, writes it, or even acts in it?  Hire Chow Yun Fat – he’ll take anything these days, as long as it tops Bulletproof Monk, right?  What, Justin Chatwin isn’t muscular enough for the part of Goku?  Pshh, what do you think this is, Batman Begins?  Uh oh, fans are complaining about Piccolo not being green…Floyd, I need you to do a color change on this pointy-eared alien so we can make more money on this movie.

Boy, I hope this studio’s at least somewhat satisfied that the money they’ve cheated off of “Watchmen” will make up for at least some of the devastating losses this movie will suffer in its first weekend…day…hour as fans make the intelligent decision to walk out of the theater 10 minutes in.  Alright, Bulma and Chi Chi look pretty hot, I’ll give them that, but this movie…eh, not so (psst…it’s online…google around for it if you dare!).  Seriously, Fox.  This is insulting of you to actually expect audiences to pay for and sit through this movie, as you did for a movie you distributed a couple weeks back titled “Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li” (I admit that I regretfully sat through that…oh, man…).

Well, Fox, you did bring us two amazing TV shows called “24″ and “House”, and from that, we at AngryWeb have managed to garner an iota of sympathy to do a little promoting of your little movie, after all your failed attempts at professional filmmaking.  Our further condolences go out to the UK, which now has to suffer from the commercial broadcasting of these 5 character spots for “Dragonball Evolution”.  For those who are actually shaking in their pants to see this r-evolutionary epic, “Dragonball Evolution” hits theaters April 18.  Hey, I’m sure it’ll be “The #1 Movie in America”!

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